Your curiosity, your terms, your privacy

Most discreet dating sites read as if every visitor is a man looking for a woman. Olivia Raven is written the other way round. The guides, the privacy advice and the tone start from the questions women tend to ask first: who will see my photo, what will my bank statement say, and how do I meet someone without giving away where I live or work.

To be straight with you, "women first" is an editorial promise, not a separate platform. The members area works the same way for everyone: free to join and browse, a paid membership to read and reply to messages, photos reviewed, and what people write about themselves not checked. Anyone aged 18 or over can join. A good place to start is the privacy checklist for women, or how the site works if you want the mechanics.

• Logging in, cancelling and deleting your accountLog in, reset your password, recognise the charge, cancel renewal and delete your account.
• Going back to monogamy: closing an open relationshipHow to raise going back to monogamy, end outside connections kindly, and rebuild trust between you.
• Discreet dating in Ireland: privacy, prices and where to get helpPrivacy in a small country, prices and currency, and the Irish contacts for scams, image abuse and sexual health.
• Ethical non-monogamy explainedOpen relationships, swinging, polyamory and the words people use, plus what makes non-monogamy ethical.
• Meeting someone new safely: advice for womenChecks before you go, choosing the place, getting home, red flags, and who to call in Ireland and the UK.
• Is Olivia Raven legit? Who runs it and what you payWho owns Olivia Raven, what you pay, what shows on your statement, what's checked, and how to cancel.
• Jealousy in open relationships, and what helpsWhat jealousy is usually telling you, what to do in the moment, and how to adjust your agreement.
• Want to open your relationship? How to start the conversationHow to raise opening your relationship, agree boundaries you can keep, handle jealousy and check in after a month.
• Online dating privacy for women: a practical checklistA step-by-step checklist: email, photos, profile details, messaging, meeting, devices, payments and leaving.
• Romance scams and sextortion: the warning signsHow romance scams and sextortion work, the warning signs, what to do if you're targeted, and where to report in Ireland and the UK.
• Sexual health when you have more than one partnerAgreeing safer sex, testing and sharing results, PEP and PrEP, and where to get free, confidential testing in Ireland and the UK.
• How to talk to your partner about your fantasiesHow to share a fantasy without pressure: timing, first words, a yes/no/maybe list, handling a no, and acting on one safely.

Payments go through the network's checkout, Dating Foundry, and the billing name that will appear on your statement is shown at checkout, so check it before you pay. Anything the members area sends you, such as a password reset, goes to the email address you sign up with, so many people use a separate address kept only for dating.

Your profile is seen more widely than you might assume. Profiles are shared across a network of partner sites, so members of those sites can see and message you too. Pick photos you'd be comfortable with anyone on that network seeing; the photo rules don't allow nudity or lingerie in any case. The privacy and discretion page goes through each of these in turn.

Meet somewhere public and busy, get there and home under your own steam, and tell a friend who you're meeting, where, and when you'll check in. Keep it short: a coffee is far easier to leave than a three-course dinner.

Leave if they push for your address, press you to drink more or move somewhere private, or turn out to be different from the person you've been messaging. You don't owe anyone an explanation. The first-meeting guide covers the details, and romance scams and sextortion covers the people who never intend to meet at all.

Olivia Raven is a brand name. There is no woman called Olivia Raven running the site, writing the guides or answering messages, and the site has no connection with anyone who shares the name. It is run by Ambervine Inc, a Delaware company, and member profiles are shared with partner sites in the same network. Read about the brand, the key facts or is Olivia Raven legit? for the full picture.